And I had something deep and meaningful to say tonight, but then the loaf pinched and all my inspiration was gone. So, instead I will describe myself - I am soon to be laid off, I will probably have to move back home, and this will probably lead to break-ups and loneliness. I can tell you, this is not because every instinct I've ever had was wrong, and I will not be doing the opposite from now. But this is a pretty low point to begin a blog, so I promise from now on I will go up and forward from here.
My only concern is that I develop a purpose for going up and forward.
Let me back-track a little...I arrived in Canada in late 2007. I had left a cushy government job in New Zealand, and decided to go to North America, not to travel around and find myself, but to create a small fall in my life and find it's purpose. Instead, I got a crappy job, travelled around a little, learned how to pass the time in Montreal, and now I find myself in this situation. It's like I've gone no-where. It's nice having a job, buying stuff, going skiing. I have friends and a really great girlfriend, long-distance she may be.
But in the main my life feels purposeless, and I have accepted the cocoon of freedom.
I will blog my metamorphosis. Maybe it will still mean having a crappy job. Hopefully it doesn't mean embracing a violent ideology or joining the Movementarians. It may involve embracing a belief-system I previously dissed. We shall see. Perhaps I should list this:
Potentially in - Belief-systems, employment.
Probably out - joining violent revolution, becoming porn-star
"Probably" not a porn star - you wish!
ReplyDeleteOr rather I hope not.